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Another installment of Spaiku, William Pratt Edition. Poor lamb. (Thanks to Mister Beta for giving up his lunch hour to play haiku eye-chart with me. "Which do you like better, this one or this one? Yes? What about if I do. . .this to it. Or this!" I was like an evil optometrist with this batch.)
BtVS, S5. G.
--

I.
Pages torn from hands--
grist for genteel derision
of bourgeois bullies.


II.
Miss Adams retreats,
scorns the lively badinage.
Could this be a sign?


III.
Stammers and blushes:
heartened by her inquiry,
blurts his devotion.


IV.
You’re beneath me! Oh.
Sees his folly and wilts in
mortification.


V.
Taunts fresh in his ears,
William the Bloody Awful
stumbles towards his fate.

(part 4: renunciation)

Comments

( 35 dropped by — come on in )
herself_nyc
May. 28th, 2008 08:34 pm (UTC)
I'm teary-eyed myself after reading these!
Perfect. So evocative.
mere_ubu
May. 28th, 2008 09:00 pm (UTC)
Ohh, thank you! William's been breaking my heart lately. I think that the junior high orchestra geek part of me just wants to stuff him in a cab and send him home to Mother before anything else happens to him. But it is not to be. . .
herself_nyc
May. 28th, 2008 09:07 pm (UTC)
the junior high orchestra geek part of me

What a great part to have!
What are your other parts? Heee.
mere_ubu
May. 28th, 2008 09:27 pm (UTC)
*sniff* Children can be so cruel. Everyone disdains the concertmistress!

Heh-heh. I'm pretty sure that part is the one that evolved into the mean high school girl who could make people cry by telling them their inner truths. *smiles* I'm nice now, though. Really! I save it all for complaint letters.

That icon always makes me smile. *waves at Miss T*
philips
May. 28th, 2008 09:00 pm (UTC)
Taunts fresh in his ears,
William the Bloody Awful
stumbles towards his fate.


*bursts into tears*

Can I save this place for when I'm more coherent? Your brilliance deserves my best. Oh, MERE. Badinage and bourgeois bullies are just wonderful.
herself_nyc
May. 28th, 2008 09:07 pm (UTC)
*bursts into tears*

So did I!

philips
May. 28th, 2008 09:19 pm (UTC)
I just told her about my hormonal fragility! Where the hell was the warning for that?

I can't believe how much she captures with a handful of syllables. Incredible.
herself_nyc
May. 28th, 2008 10:26 pm (UTC)
my hormonal fragility!

I got home just now to discover I'd started my period a day early -- or what I thought was two days early because I didn't know quite what day today is. Eeerk. At least I didn't stain my new skirt.
mere_ubu
May. 28th, 2008 09:34 pm (UTC)
Aw crap. No crying! I'm supposed to be past the making people cry phase!

*squishes you both* Just think of it as payback for all that angsty fic and those sad, sad drabbles. *wibbles* Poor Joyce!

I'm going to go blush and pinch myself some more now.
mere_ubu
May. 28th, 2008 09:47 pm (UTC)
Thank you, dear. That haiku was one of those startling ones that just popped into my head all ready to go. It's been migrating around the house on a post-it for three months and waiting for me to write towards it. (Writing? Sadly, much harder than popping.) I'm so glad it worked for you. *hands you kleenex* I think that's quite enough feedback for this lot.

Edited at 2008-05-28 09:48 pm (UTC)
petzipellepingo
May. 28th, 2008 11:44 pm (UTC)
Pages torn from hands--
grist for genteel derision
of bourgeois bullies...

Taunts fresh in his ears,
William the Bloody Awful
stumbles towards his fate.


Poor sweet William "sniffles". You've summed up his last moments beautifully.

mere_ubu
May. 29th, 2008 12:29 am (UTC)
Thank you so much. It always gives me chills to watch this scene and see how much of this final mortal incident he carries into his unlife.
louise39
May. 29th, 2008 12:00 am (UTC)

William opening himself up to happiness or humiliation and worse.

Sees his folly and wilts in
mortification.


So poignant. So precisely what we saw.

Thank you. This was my favorite episode.


mere_ubu
May. 29th, 2008 12:34 am (UTC)
Thank you, Louise. I love that brave little moment where you can see him make the decision to tell Cecily how he feels. The fact that she just stares at him like he's something she scraped off her shoe never stops being shocking to me.
(Deleted comment)
mere_ubu
May. 29th, 2008 04:42 am (UTC)
*shakes head* Poor baby. He takes a big risk and it just turns out so badly for him.

Thank you, sweetie! I'm delighted that you're continuing to enjoy them.
ladyaelfwynn
May. 29th, 2008 12:59 am (UTC)
Yay! There's more!

Oh, my poor, dear William! **wants to squish him with hugs**

You do such a good job in bringing out what I feel is the essence of William/Spike with such scant syllables with which to work. I want to smack Cecily for being so mean to him.

P.S. I hope you don't mind that I've friended you. :-)
mere_ubu
May. 29th, 2008 04:49 am (UTC)
Yes--big hugs for William!

Thank you! I'm so glad these worked for you. *scowls* Even the later discovery that she's a vengeance demon doesn't vindicate Cecily's horrible treatment of him.

I don't mind one bit! *g*
zanthinegirl
May. 29th, 2008 03:53 am (UTC)
Poor William!

::loves theses::
mere_ubu
May. 29th, 2008 04:52 am (UTC)
Thank you, darlin. I love that you love them! :D

*pets William and offers him cookies*
missus_grace
May. 29th, 2008 06:20 am (UTC)
Another wonderful job! I love your use of Victorian language!
mere_ubu
May. 30th, 2008 04:07 am (UTC)
Thank you, dear! *snorfle* Now I have to figure out how to stop using it before someone beats me up and takes my lunch money. ;)
jamalov29
May. 29th, 2008 08:16 am (UTC)
I've just read 'Inspiration' and 'Humiliation' and you gave me shivers.
You captured William's distress so beautifully.
William the Bloody Awful
stumbles towards his fate
.How heartbreaking and inevitable.

I wanted to wrap him in my arms and took him back hometo his beloved mother.But we wouldn't have our magnificent Spike, then.
mere_ubu
May. 30th, 2008 05:56 am (UTC)
What a wonderful compliment! Thank you so much for reading.

*nods* Me too! I know it has to happen, but poor William! He needs his mother to fix him a nice cup of tea. :(
stars_of_tears
May. 29th, 2008 04:21 pm (UTC)
awww... so moving
mere_ubu
May. 30th, 2008 05:14 am (UTC)
Thank you for reading! Poor William. *pets him*
diachrony
May. 29th, 2008 10:37 pm (UTC)
Aw, poor woobie-man. ::sniffle::

William the Bloody Awful is about to become William the Bloody in a whole other sense. I get shivers.
mere_ubu
May. 30th, 2008 05:20 am (UTC)
*sigh* He's just a terribly sad little man.

You know how I love teh Spike, but I confess that as I write towards the whole turning scene, I'm totally dragging my feet. *facepalm* I think I'm trying to prolong his life!

Thanks for reading, style maven. ;)

ETA that I lurrrve your icon. Hee!

Edited at 2008-05-30 05:22 am (UTC)
selinde2
May. 30th, 2008 03:56 am (UTC)
Thank goodness
Petzipellipingo recced you or it might have been all day before I found these! Just lovely - 'badinage' - and 'wilts in mortification'. Thank you thank you thank you.
mere_ubu
May. 30th, 2008 05:25 am (UTC)
Re: Thank goodness
You're so very-very-very welcome-welcome-welcome. Huh. Is there an echo in here? :P

And thank you! I'm delighted that you enjoyed these. I had a good time writing them (at least when I wasn't actively feeling sad for William.)

Happy Friday, dear!
prettycrabby
May. 30th, 2008 02:25 pm (UTC)
Heeeeee
I am glad you are using your powers for good not evil!
mere_ubu
May. 30th, 2008 02:40 pm (UTC)
Re: Heeeeee
*tackleglomps you* Hey, girlie! Aww, purty you.

I dunno how these kinds of things happen. One day you're just boppin' along listening to FB like a normal, sane person and the next you're waking up in the middle of the night with an uncontrollable urge to write vampire haiku. I decided to go with it. And I have no idea how my dolls got up to that kind of business.

moscow_watcher
May. 31st, 2008 09:12 am (UTC)
I'm finally catching up with my f-list.

Awww, poor William! "Wilts in mortification", indeed.
mere_ubu
May. 31st, 2008 05:45 pm (UTC)
Poor little guy. Knowing he's at the core of Spike just makes me love Big Bad all the more.

Thanks for reading, lady!
ellbogen
Jun. 9th, 2008 12:59 am (UTC)
I friended you!
rebcake
Oct. 8th, 2011 10:39 pm (UTC)
*sniff*

Much as I adore "the lively badinage" wording — such a rose-colored way of looking at cruel social torture — these are incredibly sad. Curses! *loves when you make me cry*
( 35 dropped by — come on in )